Operation: Thriving Marriage

Ep 86 - In-laws: Navigating Boundaries, Expectations, and Blessings

 

Episode 87 – 

In-Laws: Navigating Boundaries, Expectations, and Blessings

In-laws often get a bad rap. From sitcom jokes to horror stories passed around at bridal showers, it’s almost a cliché to talk about how difficult mothers-in-law can be. But are in-laws really the problem—or is it the lack of clear boundaries and expectations that causes the most damage?

 

In this episode of Operation: Thriving Marriage, Bryon and Jennifer Harvey dive deep into the often-sensitive topic of in-law relationships. They challenge the stereotype that in-laws are always intrusive or toxic and instead present a more balanced view: in-laws can be either a blessing or a burden, depending on how couples handle the relationship.

 

Bryon starts the conversation by pointing out that in-laws are commonly misunderstood and unfairly criticized. Jen adds her perspective and highlights that many couples actually long for more connection with extended family—especially when distance or loss creates a void. The key isn’t to push in-laws away but to create healthy, God-honoring boundaries that protect the marriage.

 

Of course, the problems are real. In-laws can be invasive. They can have strong opinions about how holidays should be spent, how children should be raised, or how decisions should be made. These problems often stem from unshared or unspoken expectations—on both sides. When couples don’t talk through what’s acceptable and what isn’t, they leave room for conflict, misunderstanding, and resentment.

 

Before offering solutions, Bryon and Jen take a moment to acknowledge that culture plays a big role in how families interact. In some cultures, extended family is deeply involved in day-to-day life. In others, independence is prioritized. So it’s not about “right” or “wrong,” but about clarity and unity as a couple.

 

Looking to Scripture, the Harveys highlight that even in the Bible, in-law dynamics could be messy. Think of Jacob and Laban—manipulation, dishonesty, and control defined that relationship. It’s a powerful reminder that family doesn’t always operate in a healthy way, and it’s okay to draw a line when needed.

 

The bottom line? Your marriage is your marriage. When you got married, you started a new family, and that relationship must come first. That means you need to establish boundaries—not out of rebellion or bitterness, but out of love and wisdom.

 

Bryon and Jen walk through a helpful process for setting those boundaries:

 

• Identify what your in-laws expect by having clarifying conversations.
• Discuss your own expectations as a couple regarding your relationship with extended family.
• Talk through specifics like how much time to spend together, who hosts holidays, what to do for birthdays, how to handle gifts, and how to engage with siblings-in-law differently than parents-in-law.
• Address concerns directly with your own parents—don’t expect your spouse to fight your family battles.
• Remember Genesis 2:24: leaving your parents and becoming one with your spouse isn’t about cutting ties—it’s about forming a new primary relationship.

 

 

As the episode wraps up, the Harveys emphasize that in-laws truly can be a huge blessing. When approached with clear communication and firm-but-loving boundaries, they can be a significant source of support and encouragement. But if left unchecked, they can also become a damaging influence on your marriage—especially when unspoken expectations carry over into your home.

 

The key is to always prioritize your relationship with your spouse. When you’re united, you can handle the complexities of extended family without letting them erode the foundation of your marriage.

 

 

 

Key Scripture:

 

“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” – Genesis 2:24 (NIV)

 

 

 

 

Want more support on this topic?

 

 

Grab a copy of Operation: Thriving Marriage for practical tools to strengthen your relationship, or browse other episodes on boundaries, conflict resolution, and biblical marriage principles.

 

📲 Don’t forget to subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. And if this episode helped you, share it with a friend—and maybe even your in-laws.

Ep 85 - Building Emotional Intimacy

Episode 85: Building Emotional Intimacy

 

When people think about intimacy in marriage, the first thing that usually comes to mind is sex. For many couples, the idea of intimacy is wrapped up in romance, physical affection, or sexual connection. But in reality, true intimacy—especially emotional intimacy—goes much deeper than that.

 

In today’s episode of Operation: Thriving Marriage, we’re tackling one of the most misunderstood aspects of marriage: what intimacy really is, why it’s so important, and how couples can begin building it intentionally.

 

We believe one of the biggest problems in marriages today—especially in our Western culture—is that we’ve lost sight of what intimacy truly means. We often equate it with romance or sex, thinking if the physical side of the relationship is okay, the rest will follow. But that’s simply not true.

 

Romance and intimacy do form a powerful cycle—each can feed and support the other—but they are not the same thing. And when we make sex the goal of intimacy, we miss the depth of connection God designed marriage to have. In fact, misunderstanding intimacy often leads to disappointment, frustration, and emotional disconnection. Over time, that disconnection can become dangerous. It’s no coincidence that infidelity and lack of intimacy consistently top the list of reasons for divorce in the U.S. Most affairs aren’t just about sex—they’re about a longing to feel deeply known and emotionally connected.

 

So what’s the solution?

 

We believe it starts with redefining intimacy—not just by our own standards, but by God’s. A quick survey of the dictionary offers some helpful words: close, private, personal, deep knowledge. Emotional intimacy in marriage is all of those things. It’s about knowing your spouse and being known by them. It’s about vulnerability, honesty, and trust.

 

In the Bible, the phrase used to describe Adam and Eve in the garden is simple but profound: “naked and not ashamed.” That’s not just a reference to physical nakedness. It’s about being fully open, fully exposed—emotionally and spiritually—with nothing to hide and no fear of rejection. That’s the kind of intimacy God intends for marriage.

 

But here’s the key: emotional intimacy doesn’t happen by accident. It takes work. It takes intention. And it takes time.

 

In this episode, we share practical ways couples can build emotional intimacy, starting today:

 

• Have conversations that go beyond logistics—not just about work, kids, or household responsibilities, but about each other. How are you really doing? What are you dreaming about? What’s weighing on your heart?
• Talk about ideas, not just things. Discuss faith, purpose, fears, and goals. Real intimacy grows when you explore deeper waters together.
• Spend time together without distractions. Plan a date night. Take a walk. Or simply sit on the couch with no screens in front of you.
• Forgive each other quickly and completely. Nothing blocks intimacy like unresolved resentment.
• Have fun together. Laughter bonds hearts. Don’t underestimate the power of shared joy.
• Practice non-sexual touch—a hand on the shoulder, a kiss on the forehead, a long hug.
• Yes, make time for sex, but remember that in Hebrew, the euphemism for sex is “to know.” That speaks volumes about the level of intimacy God designed for the sexual relationship in marriage.

 

 

At the heart of it all, God intends for marriage to be the closest human relationship we experience. Genesis 2 paints a beautiful picture of this connection: “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united with his wife, and they become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked, but they were not ashamed.”

 

Emotional intimacy is about creating that kind of space in your marriage—where you are both fully known, fully loved, and never ashamed.

 

So ask yourself today: What can I do to build deeper emotional intimacy in my marriage? Because thriving marriages aren’t built on convenience or chemistry. They’re built on intentional connection—day by day, choice by choice.

Ep 84 - Main Character Energy

In Episode 84 of Operation: Thriving Marriage, Bryon and Jen Harvey dive into a trending concept from Gen Z culture: “Main Character Energy.”

Bryon kicks off the conversation by sharing how he came across the term and what it means—seeing yourself as the central figure in every situation. Jen offers insight into how this mindset can subtly affect relationships, especially in the context of marriage.

In marriage, “main character energy” often shows up as self-centered responses to your spouse’s honest communication. For example, one spouse might express a want or need, only for the other spouse to spiral into self-doubt, guilt, or defensiveness. Instead of hearing the concern for what it is, the response becomes about personal failure—how they aren’t measuring up. Bryon shares how he used to feel inadequate when Jen needed to talk to her friends, misinterpreting her need for community as a sign he wasn’t enough.

But the truth is: It’s not always about you. Sometimes your spouse just needs to express themselves, and it’s not a reflection on your performance as a husband or wife. Bryon and Jen discuss how even negative self-focus is still a form of pride—it centers the conversation on you, rather than your partner. Jen highlights Philippians 2:3 (NET): “Instead of being motivated by selfish ambition or vanity, each of you should, in humility, be moved to treat one another as more important than yourself.”

They also quote Rick Warren’s famous line: “Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It’s thinking about yourself less.” This mindset shift is essential for healthy, God-honoring communication.

When your spouse shares a concern, the most loving response is to listen without reacting defensively. Practice active listening without trying to fix the problem right away. In many cases, your spouse may just need a listening ear. And when your spouse is asking for a change in attitude or action, view it as a gift—not a criticism. They’re giving you a clear way to love them better.

It’s also important not to spiral into insecurity. Remind yourself: your spouse loves you, chose you, and continues to say yes to you daily. Trust that if they need something specific from you, they’ll communicate it directly. And for the spouse who’s expressing a concern—don’t drop hints. Be clear and direct. Marriage isn’t a guessing game; it’s a safe, sacred space to speak openly and specifically.

The episode wraps up with this truth: Main character energy destroys many relationships. Yes, you are vitally important to your spouse. But not everything is about you. When your spouse shares a concern, let it be their concern. Support them, listen, and trust that love grows when we stop making ourselves the center of every story.

Operation: Thriving Marriage continues to help couples build stronger, Christ-centered relationships—together. Don’t forget to subscribe and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it!

Ep 83 - No Perfect Marriages

In Episode 84 of Operation: Thriving Marriage, Bryon and Jen Harvey dive into an important truth: there are no perfect marriages. While we often focus on communication and addressing issues, today’s episode explores why unpacking every problem can sometimes do more harm than good in your relationship.

 

Many couples fall into the trap of thinking they need to discuss and fix every little irritation. But over-unpacking issues can create unnecessary friction, add pressure to be “perfect,” and even bury the good parts of your marriage under a mountain of complaints. Instead of helping, this approach often decreases authentic communication. Usually, one spouse brings up the majority of the concerns, while the other feels overwhelmed and eventually shuts down. Even if the conversation continues, real communication often stops. Over-processing can also turn into a subtle form of control—an attempt to mold your spouse into someone they aren’t—and creates unrealistic expectations for what a marriage should look like.

 

Bryon and Jen are honest about how even Operation: Thriving Marriage might unintentionally contribute to this mindset by encouraging open conversations. While talking through important things is crucial, talking about everything will eventually mean fixing nothing.

 

The solution? Focus on connection over correction. Jen shares a personal story about talking to her friend Bev during a stressful time when Bryon wasn’t meeting her expectations around housework while she was pregnant. That experience highlighted a key insight: the goal of marriage isn’t to fix each other—it’s to stay deeply connected.

 

When couples focus on building connection, they find their relationship becomes naturally stronger and healthier. In high-connection marriages, daily tasks like doing the dishes, feeding the cat, or walking the dog don’t spark arguments. Instead, spouses step up to help without being asked, and responsibilities even out over time. One partner may handle more chores inside the home, while the other takes on more outside responsibilities—but there’s a spirit of teamwork rather than scorekeeping.

 

Bryon and Jen encourage listeners to maximize small moments of connection throughout the day: holding hands, sharing a quick touch, doing chores side-by-side, or running errands together. Sometimes, the best way to “fix” a small annoyance is simply to take care of it yourself—whether that’s wiping up toothpaste, putting away a glass, or hanging up the keys—without making it a battle.

 

Importantly, this doesn’t mean ignoring major problems in your marriage. Serious issues should absolutely be addressed. But it does mean prioritizing wisely, and not allowing minor annoyances to grow into major conflicts simply because they were overthought or over-discussed.

 

Bryon and Jen close the episode with a powerful reminder from Scripture. Ephesians 4:1-3 (NET) says:

 

“I, therefore, the prisoner for the Lord, urge you to live worthily of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”

 

Although Paul originally wrote these words about relationships within the church, the principle is vital for marriage too. By approaching each other with humility, gentleness, patience, and love, couples can work together to maintain the unity and peace that God designed marriage to reflect.

 

If you’ve ever felt like you had to fix every small frustration to have a great marriage, this episode is for you. No Perfect Marriages offers practical, faith-based advice for focusing on what matters most—building a marriage filled with connection, grace, and peace.

 

Be sure to subscribe to Operation: Thriving Marriage for more real, encouraging conversations about how to build a marriage that not only survives, but thrives

Ep 82 - How to Sabotage Your Marriage With Money

In Episode 82 of Operation: Thriving Marriage, Bryon and Jen Harvey tackle a topic that hits close to home for nearly every couple: how mishandling money can sabotage your marriage. Bryon begins the conversation by asking Jen, “You deal with a lot of different family issues as a lawyer. What do you see as the biggest contributor to strife in marriage?” Drawing on both professional and personal experience, Jen explains that while financial stress is a common challenge, it’s really about how couples connect—or fail to connect—through that stress. Money is emotionally charged. It touches everything: our goals, our upbringing, our values, and our sense of security. When couples don’t know how to talk about money or approach it as a team, the consequences can be devastating.

 

Referencing a 2024 Fidelity study, Bryon and Jen note that 45% of couples argue about money at least occasionally, and 25% say money is the number one challenge in their marriage. Clearly, finances are a serious issue. But rather than focusing on surface-level fixes, this episode digs into the root causes of money-related tension in relationships and offers biblical, research-backed solutions for building financial unity in marriage.

 

One of the biggest takeaways from the episode is the importance of combining bank accounts. According to multiple studies, couples who combine their finances report higher levels of satisfaction in their marriage. It’s not just about practicality—it’s about unity. When you have a shared account, you’re forced to communicate, collaborate, and create financial goals together, whether that’s saving for a home, planning for retirement, or managing everyday expenses. On the flip side, keeping separate accounts can breed suspicion, secrecy, and division. Bryon sums it up with a powerful statement: “If you can share a bed, you can share a bank account.”

 

Another major factor that undermines financial harmony is what Bryon and Jen call “unexpectations”—the unspoken beliefs, habits, and assumptions we bring into marriage without ever realizing it. These come from our families of origin, our experiences before marriage, and even what we absorb from media, television shows, podcasts, and celebrity financial advisors. When couples don’t talk about these expectations, they become invisible barriers that block trust and intimacy.

 

The episode also reminds listeners that expenses will inevitably increase over time. Whether it’s the cost of raising children, adjusting to a higher standard of living, or dealing with inflation, planning ahead is essential. Couples who don’t anticipate financial changes often find themselves overwhelmed and reactive, which only adds to the strain.

 

One of the more sensitive but critical points Bryon and Jen address is the role extended family can play in sabotaging financial unity. While it’s perfectly okay to seek wise counsel from parents or friends, your financial decisions should be made by you and your spouse alone. It’s crucial to establish boundaries, especially with in-laws, and to never share financial information with anyone your spouse isn’t comfortable with. Financial privacy and unity go hand in hand.

 

As the conversation draws to a close, Bryon and Jen bring it back to a biblical perspective. Money is one of the greatest competitors for our loyalty to God. Jesus said, “You cannot serve both God and money” (Matthew 6:24), and Paul warned that “the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil” (1 Timothy 6:10). The goal of marriage isn’t just happiness—it’s holiness. God gives us marriage as a way to grow more like Christ, and learning to manage money together is a key part of that journey. When couples are faithful with the little they’ve been given, they position themselves to be entrusted with more—and to one day hear those words from Jesus: “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

 

Whether you’re newly married or decades in, this episode offers valuable insight and practical steps for cultivating financial unity in your relationship. If you’ve ever argued about money, kept financial secrets, or felt misunderstood by your spouse about money matters, Episode 83 is a must-listen. Bryon and Jen combine biblical wisdom, real-life experience, and research-backed advice to help you avoid the common traps that sabotage marriages—and to build a thriving relationship grounded in trust, transparency, and shared purpose.

 

Subscribe to Operation: Thriving Marriage on your favorite podcast platform and share this episode with someone who could use a fresh perspective on faith and finances in marriage.

Ep 81 - How to Sabotage Communication (Part 2)

In this episode of Operation: Thriving Marriage, we’re continuing our conversation on how couples sabotage communication in marriage. Last time, we talked about harboring resentment and bottling up emotions — if you haven’t listened to that episode yet, we encourage you to go back and check it out. Today, we’re diving into three more common ways communication breaks down between spouses: allowing arguments to grow, refusing to apologize, and reacting without thinking.

 

Arguments are actually a natural part of any healthy marriage. If you and your spouse never argue, something is off — either you’re not communicating openly, one of you is avoiding sharing your thoughts and feelings, or one of you is shutting down the other. But while arguments are normal, how you handle them makes all the difference. One of the biggest ways couples sabotage communication is by letting arguments grow out of control. Instead of focusing on the issue at hand, couples often start bringing up past wrongs, a habit we call “keeping receipts.” Or they deflect by saying, “Oh yeah? Well, what about when you…?” which often comes up during fights about in-laws. Sometimes, couples engage in one-upmanship, trying to prove who’s done worse. To keep arguments from growing, it’s important to set ground rules when you’re not arguing — like agreeing not to bring up old issues, finding ways to stay on track, and knowing when to take a break if things get too heated.

 

Another way communication breaks down is when one or both spouses withhold apologies. Saying “I’m sorry” is one of the most important things you can do in marriage — and it has to be sincere. That means leaving out the “but” that excuses your behavior. Some people refuse to apologize because they don’t want to admit fault, see it as a sign of weakness, or want to maintain control. But withholding apologies creates emotional distance, removes safety from the relationship, and ultimately rejects your spouse. Nothing will kill communication and destroy a marriage faster than refusing to say, “I was wrong, and I’m sorry.” There’s no secret tip to this one — you just have to do it.

 

The last communication saboteur we cover is reacting without thinking. Bryon shares that this is something he has struggled with personally, often wanting to act first and think later. While that may have been useful in the military, it’s not a healthy way to treat your spouse. When you react without thinking — saying or doing things without consciously choosing them — you create an unsafe environment where your spouse feels like they have to walk on eggshells. Fixing this takes discipline, and honestly, you’re the only one who can fix you. Prayer is crucial here, asking the Holy Spirit to help develop self-control. It also helps to invite your spouse into the process. Give them permission to gently call you out when you’re reacting instead of responding thoughtfully, because you can’t fix a problem you don’t recognize in the moment.

 

Communication is essential to a thriving marriage, but we all sabotage it sometimes. Over these two episodes, we’ve talked about five of the biggest ways: harboring resentment, bottling up emotions, allowing arguments to grow, withholding apologies, and reacting without thinking. What are some other ways you’ve seen communication sabotaged in marriage? We’d love to hear from you at operationthrivingmarriage.com or on Facebook and Instagram. And if you found this episode helpful, please rate and review the podcast to help other couples find us and thrive in their marriages too.

Ep 80 - How to Sabotage Communication

In this episode of Operation: Thriving Marriage, we’re diving into two of the biggest ways couples sabotage communication without even realizing it: harboring resentment and bottling up feelings. Communication is essential to solving any problem in marriage, and if you can’t talk openly and honestly, you’ll stay stuck. Resentment builds when expectations are unspoken, unmet, or unreasonable — what we call “Unexpectations.” Whether it’s about chores, money, kids, or in-laws, resentment creates emotional walls and keeps you from having real conversations. The only way to deal with it is to face it head-on in a loving, calm way, and work together toward a solution.

 

We also talk about how bottling up feelings damages communication. Emotions—pleasant or unpleasant—are natural responses to life. But when you hide how you feel, you create distance from your spouse, and eventually, resentment. Instead, allow yourself to feel your emotions, examine where they’re coming from, and share them with your spouse. When you promised to give yourself fully in marriage, that included your emotional self.

 

This is part one of a two-part series on ways we sabotage communication. Be sure to catch the next episode, where we’ll talk about letting arguments grow, withholding apologies, and reacting without thinking. If this episode helped you, share it with a friend and leave us a review!

Ep 79 - What is Love

Episode 75: What Is Love? - Operation: Thriving Marriage

Welcome back to Operation: Thriving Marriage! In today’s episode, we dive into one of the most fundamental aspects of both faith and relationships: What Is Love?

Episode Summary:

Love is often misunderstood in our culture, reduced to just a fleeting emotion or romantic ideal. But Jesus commands us to love, which means love must be more than just a feeling—it’s an attitude and an action as well. In this episode, we explore what the Bible teaches about love and how understanding love biblically can strengthen our marriages.

Key Topics Discussed:

•Love as the Foundation of Kingdom Living: From creation to redemption, everything God does is rooted in love.

•Love in Culture vs. Love in Scripture: How modern music and entertainment often distort the true meaning of love.

•The Command to Love: Jesus tells us to love one another (John 13:34-35) and love God and our neighbors (Mark 12:28-31).

•Love as Emotion, Attitude, and Action:

•Emotion: While emotions are natural responses, love isn’t just about how we feel.

•Attitude: Love is a choice. We control our attitudes and can choose to see the best in our spouse.

•Action: True love requires action, even when it’s inconvenient or sacrificial.

•The Example of David and Jonathan (1 Samuel 18 & 20): Jonathan’s love for David was more than just a feeling—it was shown through trust, support, and sacrifice.

•Practical Ways to Love in Marriage:

•Choosing to believe the best in your spouse.

•Showing love through acts of service and sacrifice.

•Cultivating love over time through intentional attitudes and actions.

Key Takeaways:

1.Love isn’t just a feeling—it’s a commitment.

2.We have control over our attitude toward our spouse. Choosing love daily leads to a stronger, thriving marriage.

3.Actions shape emotions. When we serve and love sacrificially, our feelings of love grow deeper over time.

Join the Conversation:

How do you intentionally choose love in your marriage? Let us know in the comments or on social media!

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Let’s build thriving marriages together—one loving choice at a time!

Ep 78 - We Marry Our Unfinished Business

In this episode of Operation: Thriving Marriage, we dive into the idea that we often marry our unfinished business. Relationship patterns, childhood wounds, and unmet emotional needs can shape our marriages in ways we don’t even realize. But the good news? With self-awareness and God’s guidance, we can break free from unhealthy cycles and build stronger, healthier marriages.

 

Psychotherapist Lori Gottlieb once said, “We marry our unfinished business.” But what does that mean? Many of us didn’t receive the love, support, or affirmation we needed growing up, so we subconsciously seek a spouse who will fill those emotional gaps. However, we are often drawn to what is familiar even if it’s unhealthy. This means we may end up in relationships that mirror the same emotional voids we experienced as children. In these situations, spouses may try to change each other to get the love and validation they’ve always wanted. This cycle creates tension, unmet expectations, and a dysfunctional marriage dynamic.

 

God calls us to move forward, leaving behind the baggage that holds us back. As Paul says in Philippians 3:12-14 (NET):

 

Not that I have already attained this that is, I have not already been perfected but I strive to lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus also laid hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself to have attained this. Instead, I am single-minded: Forgetting the things that are behind and reaching out for the things that are ahead, with this goal in mind, I strive toward the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

 

This principle applies to every aspect of life including marriage. If we want a thriving marriage, we must be willing to leave behind past wounds and step into the future God has for us.

 

The first step is to identify your own unfinished business. This is about you, not your spouse. What emotional wounds or patterns are you carrying into your marriage? Are you expecting your spouse to fill a void that only God can truly heal? Once you recognize these patterns, acknowledge how they affect your marriage. Be honest with yourself and your spouse about past hurts. Open up about what’s going on inside, and listen to your spouse’s observations without becoming defensive.

 

Deciding how to resolve your unfinished business is crucial. Who do you need to forgive? Are there past relationships  family, friends, or exes you need to make peace with? What toxic mindsets do you need to let go of? Do you need professional counseling or therapy to help process these issues? Taking steps to heal will not only strengthen you as an individual but will also transform your marriage.

 

Every marriage comes with baggage but that baggage doesn’t have to define your relationship. God designed marriage as a place where we can heal, grow, and become more like Christ. By recognizing our unfinished business and committing to personal growth, we allow God to shape us into the spouses He created us to be.

 

Let’s make 2025 the year of a thriving marriage—not by changing our spouse, but by allowing God to change us.

 

Don’t miss this powerful conversation! Subscribe to Operation: Thriving Marriage on your favorite podcast platform and leave us a review. If this episode spoke to you, share it with a friend!

 

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Ep 77 - Commitment: Not Getting Divorced is not Enough

Podcast Notes for Operation: Thriving Marriage

Episode 78: Commitment is More Than Not Getting Divorced

 

Commitment in marriage is often misunderstood. Many couples believe it simply means not getting divorced, but staying married isn’t enough to create a thriving relationship. True commitment requires more than avoiding separation—it’s about intentionally nurturing your marriage every day. A thriving marriage requires constant care, attention, and prioritization. Without this, couples may find themselves in a relationship that feels like a burden rather than a joy.

 

When commitment is misunderstood, it often leads to dissatisfaction and unfulfilled expectations. Couples who don’t prioritize their marriage may look for fulfillment outside the relationship, not necessarily through affairs but by escaping into work, hobbies, nonsexual relationships, or even vices like alcohol. While these escapes might seem harmless, they undermine the emotional and spiritual connection that a marriage needs to flourish. Over time, this shallow understanding of commitment leads to dissatisfaction, stunted spiritual growth, and a marriage that falls short of God’s intended design.

 

True commitment in marriage goes beyond maintaining a legal relationship or living under the same roof. It means actively pursuing safety, intimacy, and growth within the relationship. The Bible provides the ultimate example of this type of commitment through God’s relentless pursuit of us, even when we fall short. This is the model for marriage: a relentless, loving pursuit of your spouse. Commitment means doing your part regardless of your spouse’s actions, prioritizing the relationship above everything else, even things that feel rewarding or important, like work, hobbies, or even church activities.

 

A mediocre marriage isn’t God’s plan for you. Instead, pursue a relationship that is joyful, fulfilling, and spiritually enriching. Don’t settle for “meh,” and never give up on the commitment you’ve made, even if your spouse struggles. God’s example reminds us of the power of perseverance and grace in relationships.

 

Commitment is not just about avoiding divorce—it’s about loving, pursuing, and prioritizing your spouse daily. The Bible shows us that true commitment mirrors God’s relentless love for us, emphasizing grace, sacrifice, and a deep connection. Let’s reject the mindset of simply “staying together” and instead strive for a thriving, joy-filled marriage that reflects God’s design.

 

If this episode inspired you, subscribe to Operation: Thriving Marriage and share it with someone who needs encouragement. Together, we can build marriages that honor God and bring joy to our lives.