Operation: Thriving Marriage

Ep 81 - How to Sabotage Communication (Part 2)

In this episode of Operation: Thriving Marriage, we’re continuing our conversation on how couples sabotage communication in marriage. Last time, we talked about harboring resentment and bottling up emotions — if you haven’t listened to that episode yet, we encourage you to go back and check it out. Today, we’re diving into three more common ways communication breaks down between spouses: allowing arguments to grow, refusing to apologize, and reacting without thinking.

 

Arguments are actually a natural part of any healthy marriage. If you and your spouse never argue, something is off — either you’re not communicating openly, one of you is avoiding sharing your thoughts and feelings, or one of you is shutting down the other. But while arguments are normal, how you handle them makes all the difference. One of the biggest ways couples sabotage communication is by letting arguments grow out of control. Instead of focusing on the issue at hand, couples often start bringing up past wrongs, a habit we call “keeping receipts.” Or they deflect by saying, “Oh yeah? Well, what about when you…?” which often comes up during fights about in-laws. Sometimes, couples engage in one-upmanship, trying to prove who’s done worse. To keep arguments from growing, it’s important to set ground rules when you’re not arguing — like agreeing not to bring up old issues, finding ways to stay on track, and knowing when to take a break if things get too heated.

 

Another way communication breaks down is when one or both spouses withhold apologies. Saying “I’m sorry” is one of the most important things you can do in marriage — and it has to be sincere. That means leaving out the “but” that excuses your behavior. Some people refuse to apologize because they don’t want to admit fault, see it as a sign of weakness, or want to maintain control. But withholding apologies creates emotional distance, removes safety from the relationship, and ultimately rejects your spouse. Nothing will kill communication and destroy a marriage faster than refusing to say, “I was wrong, and I’m sorry.” There’s no secret tip to this one — you just have to do it.

 

The last communication saboteur we cover is reacting without thinking. Bryon shares that this is something he has struggled with personally, often wanting to act first and think later. While that may have been useful in the military, it’s not a healthy way to treat your spouse. When you react without thinking — saying or doing things without consciously choosing them — you create an unsafe environment where your spouse feels like they have to walk on eggshells. Fixing this takes discipline, and honestly, you’re the only one who can fix you. Prayer is crucial here, asking the Holy Spirit to help develop self-control. It also helps to invite your spouse into the process. Give them permission to gently call you out when you’re reacting instead of responding thoughtfully, because you can’t fix a problem you don’t recognize in the moment.

 

Communication is essential to a thriving marriage, but we all sabotage it sometimes. Over these two episodes, we’ve talked about five of the biggest ways: harboring resentment, bottling up emotions, allowing arguments to grow, withholding apologies, and reacting without thinking. What are some other ways you’ve seen communication sabotaged in marriage? We’d love to hear from you at operationthrivingmarriage.com or on Facebook and Instagram. And if you found this episode helpful, please rate and review the podcast to help other couples find us and thrive in their marriages too.

Ep 80 - How to Sabotage Communication

In this episode of Operation: Thriving Marriage, we’re diving into two of the biggest ways couples sabotage communication without even realizing it: harboring resentment and bottling up feelings. Communication is essential to solving any problem in marriage, and if you can’t talk openly and honestly, you’ll stay stuck. Resentment builds when expectations are unspoken, unmet, or unreasonable — what we call “Unexpectations.” Whether it’s about chores, money, kids, or in-laws, resentment creates emotional walls and keeps you from having real conversations. The only way to deal with it is to face it head-on in a loving, calm way, and work together toward a solution.

 

We also talk about how bottling up feelings damages communication. Emotions—pleasant or unpleasant—are natural responses to life. But when you hide how you feel, you create distance from your spouse, and eventually, resentment. Instead, allow yourself to feel your emotions, examine where they’re coming from, and share them with your spouse. When you promised to give yourself fully in marriage, that included your emotional self.

 

This is part one of a two-part series on ways we sabotage communication. Be sure to catch the next episode, where we’ll talk about letting arguments grow, withholding apologies, and reacting without thinking. If this episode helped you, share it with a friend and leave us a review!

Ep 79 - What is Love

Episode 75: What Is Love? - Operation: Thriving Marriage

Welcome back to Operation: Thriving Marriage! In today’s episode, we dive into one of the most fundamental aspects of both faith and relationships: What Is Love?

Episode Summary:

Love is often misunderstood in our culture, reduced to just a fleeting emotion or romantic ideal. But Jesus commands us to love, which means love must be more than just a feeling—it’s an attitude and an action as well. In this episode, we explore what the Bible teaches about love and how understanding love biblically can strengthen our marriages.

Key Topics Discussed:

•Love as the Foundation of Kingdom Living: From creation to redemption, everything God does is rooted in love.

•Love in Culture vs. Love in Scripture: How modern music and entertainment often distort the true meaning of love.

•The Command to Love: Jesus tells us to love one another (John 13:34-35) and love God and our neighbors (Mark 12:28-31).

•Love as Emotion, Attitude, and Action:

•Emotion: While emotions are natural responses, love isn’t just about how we feel.

•Attitude: Love is a choice. We control our attitudes and can choose to see the best in our spouse.

•Action: True love requires action, even when it’s inconvenient or sacrificial.

•The Example of David and Jonathan (1 Samuel 18 & 20): Jonathan’s love for David was more than just a feeling—it was shown through trust, support, and sacrifice.

•Practical Ways to Love in Marriage:

•Choosing to believe the best in your spouse.

•Showing love through acts of service and sacrifice.

•Cultivating love over time through intentional attitudes and actions.

Key Takeaways:

1.Love isn’t just a feeling—it’s a commitment.

2.We have control over our attitude toward our spouse. Choosing love daily leads to a stronger, thriving marriage.

3.Actions shape emotions. When we serve and love sacrificially, our feelings of love grow deeper over time.

Join the Conversation:

How do you intentionally choose love in your marriage? Let us know in the comments or on social media!

Subscribe & Share: If this episode encouraged you, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with others who want to build a thriving marriage.

Follow Us:

•Website: OperationThrivingMarriage.com

•Facebook: Operation Thriving Marriage

•Instagram: operationthrivingmarriage

Let’s build thriving marriages together—one loving choice at a time!

Ep 78 - We Marry Our Unfinished Business

In this episode of Operation: Thriving Marriage, we dive into the idea that we often marry our unfinished business. Relationship patterns, childhood wounds, and unmet emotional needs can shape our marriages in ways we don’t even realize. But the good news? With self-awareness and God’s guidance, we can break free from unhealthy cycles and build stronger, healthier marriages.

 

Psychotherapist Lori Gottlieb once said, “We marry our unfinished business.” But what does that mean? Many of us didn’t receive the love, support, or affirmation we needed growing up, so we subconsciously seek a spouse who will fill those emotional gaps. However, we are often drawn to what is familiar even if it’s unhealthy. This means we may end up in relationships that mirror the same emotional voids we experienced as children. In these situations, spouses may try to change each other to get the love and validation they’ve always wanted. This cycle creates tension, unmet expectations, and a dysfunctional marriage dynamic.

 

God calls us to move forward, leaving behind the baggage that holds us back. As Paul says in Philippians 3:12-14 (NET):

 

Not that I have already attained this that is, I have not already been perfected but I strive to lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus also laid hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself to have attained this. Instead, I am single-minded: Forgetting the things that are behind and reaching out for the things that are ahead, with this goal in mind, I strive toward the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

 

This principle applies to every aspect of life including marriage. If we want a thriving marriage, we must be willing to leave behind past wounds and step into the future God has for us.

 

The first step is to identify your own unfinished business. This is about you, not your spouse. What emotional wounds or patterns are you carrying into your marriage? Are you expecting your spouse to fill a void that only God can truly heal? Once you recognize these patterns, acknowledge how they affect your marriage. Be honest with yourself and your spouse about past hurts. Open up about what’s going on inside, and listen to your spouse’s observations without becoming defensive.

 

Deciding how to resolve your unfinished business is crucial. Who do you need to forgive? Are there past relationships  family, friends, or exes you need to make peace with? What toxic mindsets do you need to let go of? Do you need professional counseling or therapy to help process these issues? Taking steps to heal will not only strengthen you as an individual but will also transform your marriage.

 

Every marriage comes with baggage but that baggage doesn’t have to define your relationship. God designed marriage as a place where we can heal, grow, and become more like Christ. By recognizing our unfinished business and committing to personal growth, we allow God to shape us into the spouses He created us to be.

 

Let’s make 2025 the year of a thriving marriage—not by changing our spouse, but by allowing God to change us.

 

Don’t miss this powerful conversation! Subscribe to Operation: Thriving Marriage on your favorite podcast platform and leave us a review. If this episode spoke to you, share it with a friend!

 

#MarriageGoals #ThrivingMarriage #NewYearNewMarriage #ChristianMarriage #RelationshipAdvice

Ep 77 - Commitment: Not Getting Divorced is not Enough

Podcast Notes for Operation: Thriving Marriage

Episode 78: Commitment is More Than Not Getting Divorced

 

Commitment in marriage is often misunderstood. Many couples believe it simply means not getting divorced, but staying married isn’t enough to create a thriving relationship. True commitment requires more than avoiding separation—it’s about intentionally nurturing your marriage every day. A thriving marriage requires constant care, attention, and prioritization. Without this, couples may find themselves in a relationship that feels like a burden rather than a joy.

 

When commitment is misunderstood, it often leads to dissatisfaction and unfulfilled expectations. Couples who don’t prioritize their marriage may look for fulfillment outside the relationship, not necessarily through affairs but by escaping into work, hobbies, nonsexual relationships, or even vices like alcohol. While these escapes might seem harmless, they undermine the emotional and spiritual connection that a marriage needs to flourish. Over time, this shallow understanding of commitment leads to dissatisfaction, stunted spiritual growth, and a marriage that falls short of God’s intended design.

 

True commitment in marriage goes beyond maintaining a legal relationship or living under the same roof. It means actively pursuing safety, intimacy, and growth within the relationship. The Bible provides the ultimate example of this type of commitment through God’s relentless pursuit of us, even when we fall short. This is the model for marriage: a relentless, loving pursuit of your spouse. Commitment means doing your part regardless of your spouse’s actions, prioritizing the relationship above everything else, even things that feel rewarding or important, like work, hobbies, or even church activities.

 

A mediocre marriage isn’t God’s plan for you. Instead, pursue a relationship that is joyful, fulfilling, and spiritually enriching. Don’t settle for “meh,” and never give up on the commitment you’ve made, even if your spouse struggles. God’s example reminds us of the power of perseverance and grace in relationships.

 

Commitment is not just about avoiding divorce—it’s about loving, pursuing, and prioritizing your spouse daily. The Bible shows us that true commitment mirrors God’s relentless love for us, emphasizing grace, sacrifice, and a deep connection. Let’s reject the mindset of simply “staying together” and instead strive for a thriving, joy-filled marriage that reflects God’s design.

 

If this episode inspired you, subscribe to Operation: Thriving Marriage and share it with someone who needs encouragement. Together, we can build marriages that honor God and bring joy to our lives.

Ep 76 - Why Men Don’t Feel Safe

Podcast Notes for Operation: Thriving Marriage

Episode 76: Things That Hurt Men

 

Introduction

In marriage, safety should be foundational—just as it is in the military. While service members are trained to recognize and defend against dangers, the same principle applies to relationships. Marriage should be the safest human connection, but achieving this requires understanding and addressing the risks that threaten that safety.

 

This episode focuses on the dangers men often face silently in marriage. We’ll uncover some common insecurities and challenges that men rarely communicate about until it’s too late.

 

Key Takeaways:

•Marriage should be the safest human relationship you experience.

•Understanding potential dangers to relational safety is vital for both partners.

•Husbands and wives must work together to create an environment of openness and trust.

 

The Problem

Men often struggle to communicate about relationships and emotions, leaving risks and insecurities unspoken. This lack of communication can prevent wives from understanding what needs to be defended against, leading to a sense of disconnection and a lack of safety in marriage.

 

The Solution

In this episode, we’ll explore:

1.Common struggles and insecurities that men face in marriage.

2.Practical ways to start conversations that build stronger connections.

3.Why wives shouldn’t try to “diagnose” their husbands but instead create a safe space for dialogue.

 

Encouragement for Husbands:

It’s time to take a risk and be vulnerable. Ignoring these struggles won’t make them disappear. Honest conversations with your wife will lead to the love and safety you both desire.

 

Encouragement for Wives:

Your role is to listen without judgment or trying to fix things. Support your husband by creating an environment where he feels safe to open up.

 

Common Struggles for Men

1.Fear of Failure

•Men are often taught that failure is unacceptable, tying their identity and worth to success.

•This fear drives many men to become workaholics, sacrificing relationships and well-being.

2.Emotional Suppression

•Men are conditioned not to express their emotions, leading to distance, anxiety, depression, and even health issues like high blood pressure.

•While younger generations are improving in emotional openness, many men still struggle with vulnerability.

3.Trouble with Intimacy

•Men often equate their worth in romance with sexual performance, creating pressure in the bedroom.

•Women, on the other hand, typically require emotional connection for intimacy, which can be difficult when men struggle with vulnerability in other areas.

 

Overcoming These Struggles

•For Husbands:

•Take the risk to be honest with your wife about your fears and emotions. Vulnerability is key to a thriving marriage.

•For Wives:

•Accept your husband where he is. Be patient and supportive as he learns to open up. Listen with empathy, just as you would want him to listen to you.

 

Scriptural Insight:

James 1:19 reminds us to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” This wisdom is crucial for both husbands and wives as they navigate these challenges together.

 

Conclusion

Marriage thrives when it becomes a safe haven for both partners. For men, opening up about fears and struggles is essential to building that safety. For wives, listening with love and without judgment fosters the trust needed for deep emotional connection.

 

Together, let’s create marriages that reflect the safety, support, and love that God desires for us.

 

Subscribe to Operation: Thriving Marriage for more insights, and don’t forget to share this episode with someone who could benefit from it. Let’s thrive together!

Ep 75 - New Love Languages

Episode 75: New Love Languages 

Welcome to Operation: Thriving Marriage! In this episode, we’re diving into the concept of love languages—one of the most helpful tools for building strong, loving relationships. While Dr. Gary Chapman’s original five love languages have impacted countless marriages, new research shows they might not cover everyone’s unique ways of expressing and receiving love. We’re exploring the two new love languages introduced by eHarmony—Shared Experiences and Emotional Security—and how they can deepen your connection with your spouse.

Dr. Gary Chapman’s The 5 Love Languages revolutionized how couples communicate love. His framework includes:

1.Words of Affirmation

2.Quality Time

3.Receiving Gifts

4.Acts of Service

5.Physical Touch

 

These categories have helped millions of people understand themselves and their partners better. But what happens if you don’t fully resonate with any of these?

 

The Problem: A Missing Connection

 

Many couples feel frustrated when they can’t identify with one of the five love languages.

•Some struggle to communicate their love language to their spouse.

•Others feel unsure how to express love because their spouse can’t articulate what they need.

•Love languages may even feel like a moving target over time.

 

So, what’s the solution?

 

Expanding Love Languages: Two New Additions

 

eHarmony’s research revealed that nearly half of respondents feel the five love languages aren’t enough. They introduced two new categories to reflect modern relationships better:

 

1. Shared Experiences

 

•What It Means: Shared Experiences go beyond spending quality time. This love language is about creating adventures and memorable moments together.

•Signs This Might Be Your Love Language:

•You love planning trips, activities, or weekends with your spouse.

•You seek out new experiences to share together.

•Staying in for date night feels less fulfilling than going out for something exciting.

•Your most cherished memories are the adventures you’ve had together.

•You’re drawn to adventurous, open-minded people.

 

2. Emotional Security

 

•What It Means: Emotional Security focuses on feeling safe, seen, and cared for in a relationship.

•Signs This Might Be Your Love Language:

•You enjoy deep, meaningful conversations.

•You often ask questions to understand your spouse’s emotions.

•Friends turn to you because they feel emotionally safe.

•You value vulnerability and feel connected when your partner shares their feelings.

 

What if You Can’t Identify a Love Language?

 

It’s okay if you don’t fit neatly into one category! The key is to communicate openly about what makes you feel loved. Instead of focusing on labels, ask yourself:

•When have I felt especially loved?

•What was happening? Where were you, and who were you with?

•What were others doing to make you feel loved?

 

Reflecting on these moments—even those involving family and friends—can help you better articulate your needs to your spouse.

 

Love Languages Can Change

 

Recent studies show that love languages aren’t static:

•26% of people have changed how they express love in the past year.

•25% have changed how they prefer to receive love.

 

As life evolves, so do our needs. Regularly check in with your spouse to see how their love language might have shifted.

 

Conclusion: Love Beyond Labels

 

Love languages are tools, not rules. What matters most is understanding how to best communicate love in your marriage. God designed us to experience and express love—not just in our relationships with Him, but also in our earthly connections. In marriage, this love is most deeply realized.

 

Whether it’s through shared experiences, emotional security, or another love language, spend your life discovering new ways to love your spouse more fully. After all, the greatest joy in marriage is striving to outdo each other in expressing love.

 

Thank you for tuning into Operation: Thriving Marriage! Don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review. Let’s keep thriving together!

Ep 74 - Combining Accounts; Yes or No?

**Episode 74: Combining Accounts; Yes or No? | Operation: Thriving Marriage Podcast**

In this episode, Bryon and Jen explore a question often asked during premarital coaching and live events but rarely discussed openly in marriage circles: *Should we combine our bank accounts?* While questions about sex and parenting frequently arise, financial issues don’t come up as often. Why is that? Bryon and Jen delve into why this topic is essential and how it can shape the future health of a marriage.

 
Couples, especially newlyweds, often struggle with the decision of whether or not to merge their finances. Here’s a look at the range of perspectives that can make this choice challenging:

- **Combine Everything:** Some people believe full financial unity is crucial and may feel guilt if they don't do so.
- **Keep Finances Separate:** Others suggest keeping separate accounts, fearing conflict or financial incompatibility.
- **Find a Middle Ground:** Many promote a “his, hers, and ours” approach, or suggest combining accounts with individual spending allowances.

These diverse viewpoints reflect the broader reality that financial conflict is a significant cause of stress in marriages. Deciding how to approach finances can have lasting implications for a couple’s relationship.

 
While the Bible doesn’t explicitly address how married couples should manage their bank accounts, it provides guiding principles that speak to money management in marriage.

1. **Don’t Let Money Become an Idol**  
   - *Matthew 6:24*: “No one can serve two masters…You cannot serve God and money.”
   - This verse challenges us to examine our relationship with money. Does discussing finances create tension or anxiety? Are we willing to sacrifice harmony in our marriage for financial control? Keeping this in check can prevent money from becoming a divisive issue.

2. **Marriage Means Becoming One**  
   - *Genesis 2:24*: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
   - This principle suggests that joining finances can be a powerful act of unity. A 2023 study from the *Journal of Consumer Research* found that newlyweds who combined accounts reported improved relationship satisfaction, while those with separate accounts saw a decline. Combining finances helps couples feel more aligned in their goals and fosters mutual responsibility.

**When Separate Accounts Might Make Sense**  
While combining accounts is generally beneficial, there are situations where keeping finances separate may be wise:
   - **Second Marriages & Estate Planning:** Jen discusses special considerations for blended families and inheritance planning.
   - **Past Financial Abuse:** In cases where financial trauma is present, separate accounts can help couples avoid triggering past pain and foster security.

One approach to avoid, however, is a strict 50-50 split of expenses and tasks. In marriage, scorekeeping can lead to resentment and undermine the partnership. This isn't a roommate arrangement—it’s a unified journey.

Financial disagreements are a frequent cause of tension in marriage, often due to differing views on account management. While there are times when separate accounts might be appropriate, research and experience indicate that couples who combine finances generally enjoy healthier marriages. By approaching finances as a team, couples can cultivate transparency, trust, and a stronger bond.

---

Join Bryon and Jen in today’s episode for an in-depth conversation on navigating finances in marriage, setting yourself up for long-term success, and fostering peace in every area of your relationship.

Ep 73 - Being Your Spouse’s Peace

Episode 73: Being Your Spouse’s Peace - Operation: Thriving Marriage

Introduction
We recently read an article titled, "Being a Man's Peace," but what does that really mean? Does peace depend on one spouse, or is it something deeper? We’ll break down this idea and see how it aligns—or conflicts—with a biblical understanding of peace.

What Does Peace Really Mean?
In today's culture, peace is often misunderstood as the absence of conflict or simply making things calm. But in the Bible, peace—"shalom"—is much more than that. It represents wholeness, completeness, and a life rooted in Christ. It’s about knowing who you are in Him and not constantly striving for more than God has given you.

Jesus reminds us in John 14:27, "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives." This peace isn't something we create for each other. Rather, it comes from God. While you can’t be your spouse’s source of peace, you can create a relationship that fosters peace by being the safest person in their life—someone they can trust without fear or judgment.

How to Create Safety in Your Marriage
1. **Communicate Deeply and Honestly:** 
   - Share your goals, dreams, fears, and insecurities with each other.
   - Listen without judgment or interruption. Don’t listen just to respond—listen to understand. Pay attention to what’s being said, but also to tone, body language, and what might be left unsaid.
   - This type of communication builds trust, allowing your spouse to feel safe and open with you.

2. **Give Each Other Space:**
   - Even in the closest marriages, both spouses need space. Needing time alone doesn’t mean your spouse is rejecting you; it’s a necessary part of being human and experiencing shalom.
   - Allow your spouse to pursue hobbies, interests, and time away from you. This space is crucial for personal growth and emotional well-being.

3. **Create Shared Experiences:** 
   - Balance the personal space with intentional time spent together. Build memories through vacations, date nights, and inside jokes. 
   - Every couple is different, so find the right blend of space and togetherness that works for you both.

4. **Focus on Your Own Shalom:**
   - If you’re stressed, restless, or disconnected from God, that inner turmoil will affect your marriage. Focus on maintaining your own peace through prayer, Scripture reading, and spiritual disciplines.
   - A peaceful spirit within you will naturally contribute to a more peaceful, healthy marriage.

Conclusion
True peace in marriage comes from Jesus, not from each other. While you can’t be your spouse’s ultimate source of peace, you can create a relationship built on safety, trust, and spiritual growth. By focusing on honest communication, giving space when needed, and maintaining your own connection with God, you contribute to an environment where both of you can experience the peace of Christ.

---

**Maximize peace in your marriage** by applying these principles. Subscribe to *Operation: Thriving Marriage* for more insights on building a Christ-centered relationship.

Ep 72 - Can I Still Be Friends With My Ex?

**Podcast Episode Notes for "Operation: Thriving Marriage"**  
**Episode 72: Can I Still Be Friends With My Ex?**

**Introduction**  
- Is it possible or wise to stay friends with an ex? How do different people feel about maintaining such relationships, especially within the context of a marriage? In today’s episode, we’ll dive into these questions, explore the complexities of relationships with exes, and discuss how they can impact your marriage.

**The Problem: Almost Everyone Has an Ex**  
- Whether it’s someone you dated before marriage or a former spouse after divorce, ex-partners often linger in the background.  
- Feelings toward exes vary widely—from intense dislike to lingering affection.  
- These relationships are inherently different from other friendships because they once involved romantic or sexual intimacy.  
- This unique history with an ex can influence how your spouse perceives that relationship.  
- If children are involved, the situation can become even more complicated, which we will address later.

**The Solution: Can You Stay Friends With an Ex?**  
- There is nothing in Scripture that forbids maintaining a friendship with an ex. The common Christian marriage vow to “forsake all others” refers to sexual exclusivity, not friendships. Hebrews 13:4 emphasizes the importance of maintaining sexual purity in marriage.  
- While the Bible does not explicitly prohibit friendships with exes, maintaining a *close* relationship can be unwise for several reasons:
    - It may make your spouse feel undervalued or less unique.
    - Spending time with an ex could rekindle old feelings, leading to potential problems.
    - Ask yourself: Why do you want to stay in touch? Are you looking for something from your ex that should come from your spouse? This is a crucial conversation to have with your partner if that’s the case.

**Co-Parenting With an Ex**  
- Co-parenting presents a unique dynamic. Maintaining a healthy relationship with your ex is essential for your children’s well-being.  
- However, it’s equally important for all parties—your spouse, children, and ex—to understand that your current spouse takes priority in your life.  
- If you’re a step-parent, supporting your spouse’s healthy co-parenting relationship with their ex is crucial for the success of your blended family.

**Conclusion**  
- There’s no biblical mandate to cut ties with an ex, but it’s wise to carefully evaluate the nature of that relationship. Maintaining a strong, healthy marriage means putting your spouse second only to God. An ongoing close relationship with an ex could create unnecessary tensions or even harm your marriage, unless co-parenting requires continued interaction.

Keywords: Friends with exes, marriage advice, Christian marriage, staying friends with an ex, co-parenting with ex, biblical view on ex-relationships, maintaining marriage, forsaking all others, step-parenting, marriage and exes.